You know something is wrong when my lovely friend @shaan_ashleigh tweets about rebelling.
It must have been a protein low (#vegetarianproblems). This is the only way I can explain her out of character tweets. Because, as I mentioned, she is lovely. So lovely… She’s like the sun. She’s like the sun shining directly on you, on a rainy day, that just happen to be your wedding day. And then there’s also a rainbow over you head! A rainbow with glitter on it! … That’s how lovely.
Which is exactly why I was shocked by her hashtag “#rebeltuesday”.
Turns out she just wanted to press every single button in a lift, I think it was. “So tempted to press every one of these #rebeltuesday” Small act. Big rebellion. This inspired me!
First I was inspried…then I was embarrassed. I’d been behaving flipping well all day, so well in fact, that I was borderline boring…and all the while it had been #REBELTUESDAY?? The shame!! Then I was inspired again.
I’m spending the next few days in preparation. Preparation and planning. And meditation. I’m outlining my various future acts of rebellion.
There is so much I’ve already done though, that I’m left with few rebellious options. After my rebel phase (ahhh…those were the days), I am left with tattoo emblazoned ribs, a pierced lip, pictures of myself with black/pink/purple/blue hair and some frickin good memories.
What to do?? Punch the elderly? Curse in front of a nun? Where would I even find a nun?? It’s just too much pressure!
So I’ve decided to take it a little easier on the #rebeltuesday ‘s ahead. Being a rebel is hard! It takes a lot of work and anger. I’m not really as angry as I used to be. Massive acts of rebellion and defiance are so 2005.
I’m going more for the 2010 spring/summer collection of “Subtle Rebellion”.
Natalie’s List of Subtle Rebellion for spring/summer 2010 #rebeltuesday
1. Driving around with no pants on.
“Didn’t your mom ever tell you to wear clean socks in case of an accident??” Yes, she did. I’m sure the same goes for pants. But that’s why they call it #rebeltuesday
2. Tequila Tuesday.
YEA! Who better to model your rebellion on than the Mexicans?? They take cactuses??/cactuse??/cacti?? and drink what’s inside them for pete’s sake! Cactusseseses/cactuu??/cacti?? have thousands of thorns for a reason people! To make sure you keep your hands off them! The Mexicans have no fear! The Mexican saw those thorns and said- “Thcrew iiieeeth! I’m drinking iiieeeth! LOCO!!” Possibly even have your first shot before midday. #rebeltuesday
3. Screen your phonecalls!
Eeeek! So naughty!! You know you want to. That annoying person always calling, wanting to talk about completely irrelevant subjects such as varsity and boys who have highlights? Screen! Preferably, you should make sure the caller knows you are at your phone, so you should Tweet or update your Facebook straight after their phone call. #rebeltuesday
4. Eat something past it’s sell-by date.
Not chicken though. Or dairy. Also not fish. Possibly stay away from sell-by curry too. Maybe stick to like, sell-by chips. And frozen foods. #rebeltuesday
5. Listen to your iPod really loudly in the office/on the bus/in a lecture.
And make sure you’re playing something along the lines of Rise Against or Haste The Day. Loud, with lots of guitars and screams. Then, when asked to turn it down, hold up your one hand in a “can’t talk now”-fashion as you bring your other hand to your ear, saying loudly “copy that”. Then, jump up, rip off your shirt thus exposing your superman/wonderwoman shirt and run out screaming “Not on my watch, Dr Kimosabi!” in a heroic voice. #rebeltuesday
6. Say no.
Say no to ridiculous requests. In fact say no to all requests! The ones that are going to mean that tonight you’ll have to work an extra two hours at home to get it done. Or those people who invite you to a dinner party at the other end of the galaxy, when all you want to do is crawl into bed with a packet of raw 2 minute noodles and half a tub of peanut butter. Even the ones to borrow your pen. Look the person square in the eyeball and say “No way!” as if they just asked if they could marry a Russian Mail Order Bride using your ID. #rebeltuesday
7. Shout “NO!!!! YOU say a command!!!!”
at the top of your voice every time the lady in your BlackBerry says “say a command”. No matter where you are. #rebeltuesday
8. Say “ayoba” in stead of “yes”.
And “hello”. Answer your phone like this: “Ayoba, Natalie speaking. Ayoba, that’s perfect, see you tonight then. 8pm? Ayoba.” #rebeltuesday
Those should keep me nice and busy next week. Not to mention that both @stormin_ and @melkie128_ will be celebrating their birthdays! We’ll have to get a little Mexican in honour of them.
Remember, its never too late, or too early, to commit an act of rebellion. Join in and tweet all the satisfying acts you commit next #rebeltuesday and let’s do what we can for the cause.